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I thought I’m

done loving

lost boys

until you sneaked

into my window

that night,

asking for my hand.     

          But I know boys like you

so well,

I’ve fallen for

the same pair

of lies

before.     

       You’d sprinkle

some sparkly,

glittery duston meto make me fly

only to leave me

next morning,

stranded

between dreams

and reality.          

      Didn’t I tell you?

My name’s never Wendy

__________________

You ask me

to wear my scars

like my fine lover’s name

a tattoo on my pulse

but don’t you

oh don’t you know

he owns the knife

a pen to write

death on my

corrupted soul       

      Don’t you

oh don’t you know

not all scars

are meant

to be worn

like crowns 👑

I am still

lost in the

last ruins of

this version you built.

I am still

walking around,

wandering,

with no sense of

direction at all.

And the rain

pours damn hard

in that corner

where we first met,

but

in the comfort of

crumbling remains, 

 I stayed,   

   lying there like a

crumpled piece of paper

where you once wrote your

lines of poetry on.

I still got them,

tucked into my pockets

like fading rays of sunshines

that cannot stand against

darker skies. 

    I stayed,

not waiting for you to

come back and

rebuild my walls,

but wishing you never left

in the first place.     

           I stayed,

asking myself,

thinking over

and over again,

Why?

Why am I the one left

roaming around the grey

when you were the one

haunting me?     

    Why am I the ghost

that is still pinned down

in this map you made up?        

            In the comfort of

crumbling remains,

I stayed.

Maybe because I really

have no sense of direction at all

And you were the city

I’m stuck in………

The heart

reaches out

to grab apen and

write down

everything it cannot say,

for the lips

cannot afford

to let words

escape and

make all

else fail                          

 So hey,

This is everything I didn’t say.          

life goes on

as time passes by

I’ve resigned to answer

with only a sigh

as i live

in this beautiful lie

i’ve finally found life

waving me goodbye

my mind is corrupted so keep those

smiles of yours

to only yourself otherwise,

i’ll want even more

my mind is plagued

so never let these hands of mine

touch yours once again otherwise,

i wouldn’t be able to draw the line

••••

you have become my fixation…

my obsession…

my infatuation…

and everything else

that my mind can think of

so please

forget about me

and the person i’ve become

leave me be

___________________